Attachment and Relationships
Early bonds with caregivers shape how we relate to others throughout life. Psychological support can help you understand these patterns and build the connections you want.
UNDERSTANDING ATTACHMENT
Why relationships can feel so hard.
Attachment theory describes how early bonds with caregivers shape our internal models of relationships, including how safe we feel with others, how we manage closeness and distance, and how we respond to conflict or disconnection. These patterns are built early and can persist throughout life, often outside of conscious awareness.
Difficulties in relationships may show up as fear of abandonment, difficulty trusting others, a tendency to become overwhelmed in closeness, or a pattern of choosing relationships that feel familiar but not fulfilling. These patterns are not flaws in character. They are adaptations that once made sense and can be changed with the right support.
Our psychologists draw on attachment-informed, psychodynamic, and schema approaches alongside evidence-based frameworks. Individual therapy and couples counselling are both available depending on your situation and goals.
COMMON SIGNS OF ATTACHMENT DIFFICULTIES
Fear of abandonment or rejection in close relationships
Difficulty trusting others, even when trust has been earned
Becoming overwhelmed or shutting down in moments of closeness
A pattern of choosing relationships that feel familiar but not fulfilling
Excessive reassurance-seeking from partners or friends
Difficulty expressing needs or setting boundaries without guilt
Feeling responsible for others' emotions or trying to manage them
A sense of being fundamentally unlovable or not enough
ATTACHMENT STYLES
Understanding your relational patterns.
Attachment styles are not fixed categories, but they help us understand the patterns of relating that developed in early life and continue to influence adult relationships.
Anxious attachment
Characterised by worry about the availability and responsiveness of important others. May involve hypervigilance to signs of rejection, reassurance-seeking, and difficulty self-soothing.
Avoidant attachment
Characterised by discomfort with closeness and reliance on others. May involve emotional self-sufficiency, minimising the importance of relationships, and withdrawing under stress.
Disorganised attachment
Often associated with early experiences of fear or unpredictability. May involve a push-pull dynamic in relationships, difficulty regulating emotions, and conflicting impulses toward closeness and distance.
Working on your relationship as a couple?
Our couples counselling service uses the Gottman Method to help partners understand each other's relational patterns and build stronger connection.
OUR PSYCHOLOGISTS
Experienced in attachment and relational work.
Lucy Adlard
Psychologist
Lucy has a particular interest in attachment and relational difficulties, working with both individuals and couples. She uses attachment-informed, schema, and Gottman Method frameworks to help clients understand their relational patterns and build more secure, satisfying connections.
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Avi Winner
Psychologist
Avi works with attachment-related difficulties from a psychodynamic and schema-informed perspective. He is known for his warmth and his ability to help clients feel genuinely understood, which itself becomes part of the therapeutic process.
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Rivkah Bendet
Psychologist
Rivkah works with relational and attachment difficulties using a warm, client-centred approach. She draws on schema therapy and CBT to help clients understand the origins of relational patterns and build healthier, more secure connections.
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Bridget Kosmas
Provisional Psychologist
Bridget works with attachment difficulties and relational trauma using a collaborative, integrative approach. She draws on CBT, ACT, and mindfulness-based frameworks to help clients develop insight into relational patterns and build greater security and self-compassion.
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Claudia Hounslow
Director & Psychologist
Claudia brings extensive experience in schema therapy and interpersonal dynamics to attachment and relationship work. Her neuropsychological background informs her understanding of how early relational experiences shape patterns in adulthood, and her work supports clients in building more secure, fulfilling connections.
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David Bokan
Psychologist
David works with attachment and interpersonal difficulties through a trauma-informed, emotionally attuned lens. He helps clients understand relational patterns and develop healthier, more satisfying connections, drawing on CBT, DBT, and mindfulness-based approaches.
View full profileRelationships can change.
Whether you are working through patterns in individual therapy or alongside a partner, our psychologists can help. No referral required.