Enough is Enough - The State of Mental Health in the AFL
The deaths of Adam and Troy Selwood have shaken the AFL community to its core. They were not just premiership players; they were fathers, brothers, teammates, and mentors. For many young people who grew up watching them, their stories have forced an uncomfortable but necessary conversation about strength, silence, and what it really means to ask for help.
The weight of what we keep hidden
Adam Selwood was more than a West Coast Eagles champion. After retiring, he dedicated himself to coaching and community work, particularly in the mental health space. When his twin brother Troy died by suicide in early 2025, Adam turned his grief into action, preparing for a charity run to raise funds for youth mental health. Just months later, Adam passed away too, leaving the football community grappling with a painful truth: even those who appear the strongest among us can be struggling in silence.
These are not just sad stories. They are part of a much larger pattern. In Australia, suicide remains the leading cause of death among men under 44. Roughly 75% of all suicides are male, and only 27% of men experiencing mental health issues ever seek help. Barriers include stigma, rigid masculine norms, and a limited emotional vocabulary that leaves many men without the language to name what they are feeling, let alone ask for support.
Facades do not always look the way we expect
Danny Frawley's passing in 2019 offered another heartbreaking lesson: mental illness does not always present as withdrawal or visible sadness. Danny was known for his warmth, humour, and the way he lifted every room he entered. Behind that generous spirit was a deep and private struggle. His story reminds us that sometimes the people who seem to be holding everything together are the ones carrying the heaviest load. Facades can look like laughter and leadership just as easily as they can look like quiet retreat. This is why understanding the physical and emotional signs of distress matters so much, especially for men who have been conditioned to perform strength.
What the AFL is doing, and what still needs to change
The AFL has begun taking meaningful steps. A formal Mental Health and Wellbeing Strategy now focuses on prevention, education, and early intervention, and some community leagues are running mental health-themed rounds to raise awareness. These are genuine movements in the right direction, but they are not sufficient on their own. The AFL is more than a game. It is a mirror of Australian culture. It shapes what young men understand about strength, leadership, and resilience. If those lessons do not explicitly include seeking help and being honest about emotional pain, the sport is sending an incomplete message to every boy watching from the stands or the couch.
A turning point for young men
For young men who have grown up idolising AFL players, this moment has to count for something. Real strength is not found in staying quiet; it is found in connection, honesty, and checking in on the people around you. Social isolation compounds these struggles, and the antidote is almost always the same: genuine human contact and the willingness to be seen. There have been calls for a dedicated Mental Health Round in the AFL, and the argument for one is strong. But what is also needed is a shift at the grassroots level. Local clubs can start conversations about wellbeing. Schools can embed emotional education into their sports programmes. Workplaces can create cultures where men feel safe to say they are not okay.
Final thoughts
Honouring Danny, Adam, and Troy means more than tributes. It means changing how we talk about mental health in homes, locker rooms, and classrooms across the country. If you or someone you know is struggling in silence, our team at Contemporary Psychology in St Kilda is here to help. Reaching out is not a sign of weakness; it is where recovery begins.